The Average Cost of a Stay-At-Home Parent

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Lately, I have been seeing a huge rise in “lazy stay-at-home mom” posts, comments, and remarks online. I have even received a few messages about how all I do is sit around, even though I am building two businesses.  But let me break it down for you to see just how valuable they can be. 

We have recently had a lot of conversations about me going back to work, but I also enjoy being a stay-at-home mom/entrepreneur.

• What it would look like if I did?
• Would I work opposite hours or the same hours as my partner?
• Where would our son go for childcare?
• Would I make more in income after taxes than we are paying for child care?
• Where would I want to work? (Would I go back to the bar and work late nights?)
• If I am giving even 10 hours a week to a job, why not devote 10 hours to my businesses?

There doesn’t seem to be a lot of easy answers to these questions. Some days I feel very overwhelmed by the number of household tasks and projects I want to do. Other days, I feel like I would love to work outside of the home. Lately, I have actually really embraced the term homemaker.

Disclaimers:

My first disclaimer to this post: Let me start by saying this is in no way a mom-shaming post for people who go back to work. If that is what is best for you and your family or if you have to out of necessity, I am proud of you for making that decision. I recognize that dual-income households also complete these tasks, but there is more of an opportunity to split some of the tasks or hire out with dual income.

My second disclaimer: I know there is a privilege with being able to have one parent stay home. This post is assuming that the household has two able-to-work adults in the first place that don’t have major health concerns. This also assumes that the household also has both adults.

And third and the last disclaimer: I do believe that it is misogynistic to think that ONLY the stay-at-home parent is in charge of these tasks. A two-adult household should be build of compromise and do the tasks that work for each partner in the household. This list is just what I personally see often and what I believe that “society” tells us is expected.

These are the roles that most Stay at Home Parents (SATP) hold within a household.

1. Childcare/Teacher
2. Chef
3. Housekeeper
4. Chauffeur
5. Accountant
6. Shopper/ stylist
7. Assistant

1. Babysitter/Childcare-

$327 a week/ $17,004 a year per child

If your kids are young enough that they don’t go to school, the SAHP is essentially the “childcare” or nanny. “The average weekly childcare cost for one infant is $565 for a nanny, $215 for a day care center (also referred as a “child care center”) and $201 for a family care center.” The average of the three numbers is $327 per week so for this exercise, we will use $327 as the average weekly cost for ONE infant.

This also doesn’t include the teaching aspect of being at home with kids. Things that they would often learn at daycare are now a task to complete at home. Things like colors, letters, numbers, tying shoes, getting dress, and much more now completely fall on the parents rather than having some help from childcare.

2. Chef

$250 a week/ $13,000 a year

I know that the stay-at-home parent is not ALWAYS in charge of every single meal, but the responsibility of the meals often falls on that adult. “The median price of a personal chef in the U.S. is about $200-$300 per week for five meals for a family of four, not including the cost of groceries, which can vary widely by city” That is JUST for 5 meals a week, where an average family eating 3 meals a day would eat 21 meals a week.

3. Housekeeper

$117.25 a week/ $6,097 a year

Again, I don’t necessarily believe that ALL of the housework falls on the SAHP. Every couple is different and makes the arrangements that they see fit for their family. “The cost of a house cleaner in top U.S. cities ranges from $13.75 to $19.75 per hour, according to current Care.com house cleaning rates.” (Middle range is $16.75 per hour.).

For this scenario, we are going to assume it is one hour of uninterrupted cleaning per day every day. That might be a little bit excessive for a professional house cleaner, but for the sake of numbers, this is what we are going to use.

4. Chauffeur

$1137.50 per week/ $59,150 a year

Once your kids are old enough to be involved in youth groups, activities, sports, and have friends, you then become a driver for them. One of the biggest struggles I have heard from parents who do work outside the home is the flexibility to get off work to drop them off from school, pick them up, take them to all of the places.

“Chauffeur prices can range from $75 to $250 per hour, but most providers have hourly minimums that will bring the prices up to $225 or all the way to $1,500 for larger vehicles.” The middle of that range is $162.50 per hour. For this scenario, we are going to use one hour a day, every day. Some families may be much more, some might be less.

5. Accountant

$44 per week/ $2,288 per year

Maybe not all couples are like this, but because I work from home/stay at home, I take care of most of the bills. I plan out the paydays, the budget, and pay the bills. Being a stay at home parents can mean that you are doing most of the spending as far as groceries, cleaning, clothes, and other products. Here is a link to my payday routine to make sure our household is taken care of financially.

According to Zip Recruiter, the average accountant makes about $22 an hour. For this scenario, we are going to say two hours a week, every week.

6. Shopper/Stylist

$160 a week/ $8,320 a week

In my experience, the stay at home parent is the one with the most buying power in the household. They do a lot of clothing, groceries, and household product shopping.

“The national average price range for personal shoppers is $120-$200 per hour. Pricing per hour can vary greatly, depending on where you live in the country and the reputation of the shopper.” As well as the average stylist being $50-$75 an hour.

For this scenario, the stay at home parent will need to shop at least one hour a week, every week. We are going to use the middle of the numbers for both professions and say that a shopper/stylist is going to be about $160 per week.

7. Assistant

$762.75 a week/ $39,663 per year

P6ersonal assistant tasks include making phone calls for the household, scheduling appointments and following through with them, keeping a schedule of the activities, birthday parties, school products, etc.

According to Zip Recruiter, the average personal assistant makes $19 an hour. The national average salary is $39,663 per year. This is pretty much an ongoing job as a stay at home parent.

This means that the average stay-at-home parent’s income according to all of these tasks is $2,798.50 a week or $145,522 a year.

“According to 2019 data from Salary.com, if you are a stay-at-home mom (or dad), and paid for your services, you would be looking at a median annual salary of $178,201. Why? Because many stay-at-home parents work around the clock. If you have young children, work can often mean nighttime feedings, greeting early morning risers, and late-night meal prep.”

This quote also included “laundry service” in their list of tasks, where to me that falls under cleaning. The website says that they do upwards of 98 hours of work per week.

Like I said, I understand that these tasks need to be done in dual-income households as well, but oftentimes, when both adults are working more tasks can be spilt compared to when one parent stays home, those tasks often fall on the stay-at-home parent.

I am not bashing anyone’s choices and I LOVE that I have the privilege and the opportunity to stay home with my child.  I do think this is a little detailed and maybe even a little petty. However, I do think that this exercise was eye-opening to see what all goes into running a household with children.

This entire post is also assuming that the stay-at-home parent doesn’t have a side hustle/ small income that they also contribute to the family.

If you are a stay-at-home parent, what else would you add to the list?